As an elder law and estate-planning attorney, I typically see two types of families: those facing an immediate crisis and those observing the gradual decline of a loved one. In both situations, feelings of concern and making decisions regarding the appropriate level of care can be overwhelming, as can the financial and legal implications that accompany these issues. Crisis often accompanies an unexpected health event or illness that requires an immediate change in the level of care. I’ve seen families scramble to determine the financial situation of their loved ones, what legal documents are in place, and how they can arrange for care. It is during these stressful periods that families wish they could go back in time to make more careful plans. When families see a gradual decline in a loved one, they typically do not see an immediate need to address it. It’s easy to put off any significant planning, especially if people don’t quite know what to do.

As time goes by, it can become more difficult to plan for aging in a way that a loved one might prefer. That’s why my advice to all families is to take the time as early as possible during times of health to create a longevity plan.

As our life expectancy increases from that of previous generations, it raises important questions about how we want to spend our “bonus years.” Humans are living as many as 10, 20, and even 30 years longer than they used to, so planning beyond immediate retirement makes it possible to live the life you envision for yourselves and your loved ones up to the very end.

A longevity plan is not a retirement plan. It goes well beyond ensuring that you have a last will and testament. While longevity planning considers finances and legal documents, it also addresses the importance of understanding available options and costs of long-term care, protecting your assets and family dynamics.

Learn more about longevity planning and how it can help you prepare for a secure future.

Holiday family gatherings are not just good for catching up; they are an ideal time to check up on your older loved ones’ status and needs. Certain clues can reveal a decline in abilities and a potential need for more help. Below are some red flags to look out for:

Physical Appearance and Household Cleanliness: Changes in physical appearance can be a red flag as to the health of a loved one. Weight loss, unopened medicine, and poor hygiene are just a few of the things to watch out for. The cleanliness of the home environment is also important to note. For example, excessive clutter, expired food, and piles of unopened mail can be signals that your loved one needs assistance.

Mobility: Changes in mobility are common with aging adults, but some signs of lessened movement are more concerning than others. Are there signs of physical pain or evidence your loved one is unsteady on their feet? Do they hold on to furniture or other household objects while walking? Can they navigate stairs safely? Updates to your loved one’s living environment may need to be made in order to keep them safe at home.

Mental Health: While it may be hard to gauge a person’s emotional well-being over the phone, you can do so with face-to-face communication. Note if your loved one seems withdrawn, has lost interest in activities he or she usually enjoys or if there are any significant changes in sleep patterns. Sudden outbursts, uncharacteristic anger or lashing out is also a cause for concern. These behaviors could be indicators of depression, contraindicated medications, declining mental function, or physical ailments requiring a physician’s attention.

Dangers: When visiting with older loved ones, take note of environmental dangers. For example, are there tripping hazards, such as throw rugs, electrical cords, uneven pavement on sidewalks or driveways that could cause a fall? If the individual is still driving, inspect the car for evidence of any minor accidents or incidents.

What do I do now? Any of these changes mean that it is time to start the conversation about long-term care wishes and plans. Make sure your loved one has a Power of Attorney, Health Care Proxy and Living Will so that you have the legal authority to help as well as the ability to get information about finances and health care.

Download our guide: Signs a Senior Needs Help at Home here.

1. The state of your finances and whether some of your assets can be protected
2. Available programs and government benefits, as well as how to set up your assets to maximize those benefits
3. Having legal documents in place, including a will, health care proxy, and power of attorney to ensure that someone you trust can make decisions on your behalf should you become incapacitated.
4. How and where you want to live if you can no longer drive or need constant care
5. Identifying family or friends who will be able to help you navigate these life changes

While none of us look forward to facing these difficult issues for ourselves or our loved ones, planning early and comprehensively can give you and your family peace of mind. Learn more.

Most of us know the importance of saving for retirement. Furthermore, good estate planning can ensure that assets are transferred correctly at death. However, many fail to plan for the “bonus years” — typically between the ages of 80 and 95 — when our bodies begin to slow down and questions begin to arise such as: “Who will care for me?” “Where will I live?” and “How will it be paid for?”

After working with hundreds of families as they navigate a fragmented, confusing, long-term care system, I can offer five good reasons to create a longevity plan:

1. If you live long enough, you will probably need some help. Increased life expectancy means that many of us will experience being “very old” (older than 85). This population has the highest risk of needing care. The need for eldercare can completely change your lifestyle and finances and throw your family into a crisis. While we plan for our healthy retirement years, we don’t always consider the need to plan for the time when health issues may arise, and we are less able to care for ourselves. Decisions may have to be made regarding your finances and living situation. Without advance planning, someone else may decide where you will live and how much of your money will be spent.

By creating a longevity plan, you can advise your family of your preferences regarding your care, where you will live, and how it should be paid for.

2. Your Will probably gives you a false sense of security. Think about it. Your Will is only effective after you die. For many people, a last will and testament is the only “plan” they have made. A will does not address long-term care, finances, or legal matters while you are still alive. You may have other legal and financial documents that have not been coordinated with your Will. If a Will is the only legal document you have completed, you have left the years before your death to fate, fortune, or someone else’s decisions. Furthermore, a Will does not save your family from probate after you die—it guarantees it! With proper planning to distribute your assets through beneficiary designations, trusts, or other tools, your family can avoid a lengthy and expensive process after you are gone.

A longevity plan helps you protect, use, or transfer your assets according to your wishes.

3. You have worked hard for your money. If you need long-term care, most expenses will NOT be covered by Medicare or your private insurance, and you may have to deplete your savings. Most often, the only alternative to private pay or long-term care insurance is the Medicaid system. Medicaid requires that you spend your assets down to what the government determines you should be “allowed” to keep.

By getting your financial and legal affairs in order before you need care, you can ensure that a significant amount of your hard-earned savings will still be there for your children after you are gone. Why spend all your life savings if there is a better way? There are government home care programs that you can qualify for without having to spend all of your money first. Because there is currently no five-year “look-back” to qualify for home care, many clients can qualify by moving money into a trust, even if care may be needed immediately or within a short period of time.

A longevity planner will know about programs and services that may be available to you and your family and offer alternatives and techniques to preserve your money.

4. Because your family may not be perfect. Maybe your children don’t live near you. Maybe they don’t get along. Maybe you don’t want to ask them for help. Do you have anything in place should you need assistance with transportation, meals, or household chores? Even if your children live nearby, they may not have the time or knowledge to help you. Or worse, each of your children thinks they know exactly what you should do, and they argue over what should “happen” to mom or dad and how your money should be spent.

A longevity plan developed by a neutral third-party can help your family navigate some of the more difficult and emotional issues with practical advice and a new perspective — relieving stress, reducing conflict, and saving you time and money.

5. Don’t end a good life by default. Do you really want someone else to determine the end of your life story? As much as our loved ones care for us and want to do the right thing, they cannot possibly know what we want if they are not told. Unfortunately, most of us spend more time planning for a vacation than we do about how our life will unfold should we need assistance.

Wouldn’t you like to know if you will be able to afford these potential expenses and still leave something for your spouse and children? Don’t you want to know if you are eligible for government programs that help defray some or all of the cost? We should enjoy our long life with gratitude. Why not look forward to these extra years by having a plan in place instead of leaving it up to chance?

You are the only one who can write the ending you want for your story and you deserve to give yourself and your family that lasting gift. You are worth it.

Learn more about longevity planning and how it can help you to live out your life in peace and security. You can also call me to schedule a consultation at 716.204.1055.

What is Longevity Planning and why is it important now? Compared to our relatives who died only a generation ago, we can expect to experience a “longevity bonus” of 20 to 30 years. That is, we will live a lot longer than most of us plan for.

At 54, I am just starting to feel a bit wiser and more liberated. I don’t want to dread getting older.

Now is the time for us to take the stage and create a new experience by redefining what aging will be like for our generation.  It is my passionate belief that, by planning sooner, we can look forward to these extra years and improve our chances of enjoying them.

With more time to experience after we retire, longevity planning can help us focus on making those years great! Too often, both individuals and families leave what happens to chance. There is no other way to state it: Planning by default is a terrible idea.

I have been a practicing Elder Law attorney for twenty years. Sadly, I have to report that our current systems for health care, legal services, financial planning, and social support all operate in separate silos. Even if we have put the parts of our plan in place, no one knows our entire story.

There is a better way: Longevity Planning.

For example, you probably have a Will and, hopefully, a Power of Attorney. But did your lawyer review your finances with your current financial advisor or the person you named to handle these important matters?

Does anyone know how you would like to spend your assets if you require long-term care? If you are fortunate enough to have children living in the area, who will have the time or ability to help you stay in your home? Many people end up in nursing homes simply because their families don’t know what else is available.

Longevity planning helps you to envision a comprehensive picture of how you want your life to unfold. Take charge before a crisis and create your own “longevity plan” with a trusted advisor!

As boomers, we have always lived differently. We redefined an entire generation. Let’s do it again by creating better plans for our final act!